Saturday, September 18, 2010
The "Hidden" Jesus
I've been reading an amazing book by Mother Teresa (the title escapes me now...) but she writes of how Jesus is hidden in the poor and suffering, and how she and others met Him during her work in Calcutta.
Today, I met Him, too.
At about 7 AM this morning, I awoke to a knock on the basement door. It was my sister, who tearfully explained that we had just received a call that Papere (my maternal grandfather) was moved from the nursing home to the Emergency Room. His heart rate was at 160, and he was unresponsive.
After dressing quickly and feeding Joseph, my husband and I, along with the rest of my family, piled into the car to go to the Emergency Room.
To make a very long story short, once we arrived at the Emergency Room, Papere's vitals had stabilized (as much as they could), but his white blood cell count was up and he was diagnosed with pneumonia.
After my parents and aunts and uncles had visited with him and Fr. R had arrived to give him the Anointing of the Sick, my husband and I went in to go see him.
When I first peered behind the curtain, I'm sure that I gasped. He was draped across the hospital bed, head tilted to one side, and looked just like the image of Christ in the Pieta. Pale skin just barely stretched over his bones and his blind eyes were cloudy. I held his hand, which seemed as delicate as a baby bird's wing.
While he wasn't sure who we were the entire time we visited, I could see that he was comforted by the touch of someone who cared for him. Several times, he called out, "Almighty God! Why won't you take me?" and my heart ached, remembering Jesus on the Cross, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?"
How I longed to comfort him- but realized my helplessness- and my littleness. It's humbling to realize that sometimes the only comfort one can really give is time and prayer.
Right now, he is being admitted to the hospital and my mother is with him.
I am so thankful I was able to be at the hospital today. Not only could I be with my grandfather, but I saw the "hidden" Jesus revealed in his suffering.
Today, I met Him, too.
At about 7 AM this morning, I awoke to a knock on the basement door. It was my sister, who tearfully explained that we had just received a call that Papere (my maternal grandfather) was moved from the nursing home to the Emergency Room. His heart rate was at 160, and he was unresponsive.
After dressing quickly and feeding Joseph, my husband and I, along with the rest of my family, piled into the car to go to the Emergency Room.
To make a very long story short, once we arrived at the Emergency Room, Papere's vitals had stabilized (as much as they could), but his white blood cell count was up and he was diagnosed with pneumonia.
After my parents and aunts and uncles had visited with him and Fr. R had arrived to give him the Anointing of the Sick, my husband and I went in to go see him.
When I first peered behind the curtain, I'm sure that I gasped. He was draped across the hospital bed, head tilted to one side, and looked just like the image of Christ in the Pieta. Pale skin just barely stretched over his bones and his blind eyes were cloudy. I held his hand, which seemed as delicate as a baby bird's wing.
While he wasn't sure who we were the entire time we visited, I could see that he was comforted by the touch of someone who cared for him. Several times, he called out, "Almighty God! Why won't you take me?" and my heart ached, remembering Jesus on the Cross, "My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?"
How I longed to comfort him- but realized my helplessness- and my littleness. It's humbling to realize that sometimes the only comfort one can really give is time and prayer.
Right now, he is being admitted to the hospital and my mother is with him.
I am so thankful I was able to be at the hospital today. Not only could I be with my grandfather, but I saw the "hidden" Jesus revealed in his suffering.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Big Shoes
10 Month Old Joseph and I...what a handsome boy!
When I accepted the position at my parish as DRE, I knew I was replacing a Titan. The lady that I had replaced formed the program from nothing and built it to where it is today- and, for the most part it runs like a well oiled machine.
I expected that after following someone who has been a parish fixture for thirteen years, that I would receive some resistance and comments. The comment that I hear almost daily is that I "have big shoes to fill." Needless to say- hearing this on a daily basis grates on my nerves.
When a lady I met told me this the other day, I replied with, "What? No I don't...I'm making my own shoes." and smiled at her. It went over well enough.
However, I've been reading a book by Mother Teresa, and this line just hit me, "If God could find someone more helpless and hopeless than me, I'm sure He could do greater things with her."
Wow.
This line both humbles me, and reminds me that I am His instrument...and that HE decides how I am to be used. As long as I do my best, and it is for the glory of God, that is what matters. 'I' am not anything. 'I' should not try to fill anyone's shoes OR create my own- but merely do what is pleasing to Him.
Other than that- things have been going well. Joseph continues to amaze me daily with how much he's changing. He is so beautiful. Four teeth now, and walking! He has even started dancing in his high chair when he hears music.
My husband has been amazing as well. If anyone has a servant's humble heart, it is him. I am so blessed to have this man in my life.
Hopefully, I will write more often after the next two weeks are over- I have so much to share.
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